Folks, this is why I opposed the bailouts. I predicted this (not this EXACTLY – I don’t think ANYBODY predicted this exactly) – I predicted that after we began handing bailouts to financial institutions and auto makers, that everybody and his mother would ask for a bailout. Well, yesterday, that pretty much happened: Hustler publisher Larry Flynt and Girls Gone Wild CEO Joe Francis that they plan on requesting that Congress allocate $5 billion for a bailout … a bailout of, you guessed it … the adult entertainment industry.
In a joint request sent to Congress, Flynt and Francis said that they want $5 billion “Just to see us through hard times. Congress seems willing to help shore up our nation’s most important businesses, we feel we deserve the same consideration. In difficult economic times, Americans turn to entertainment for relief. More and more, the kind of entertainment they turn to is adult entertainment. … We should be delivering [the request] by the end of today to our congressmen and [Secretary of the Treasury Henry] Paulson asking for this $5 billion dollar bailout.”
Owen Moogan, a spokesman for Flynt told reportes, “The take here is that everyone and their mother want to be bailed out from the banks to the big three [hey - he just stole my line!]. The porn industry has been hurt by the downturn like everyone else and they are going to ask for the $5 billion. Is it the most serious thing in the world? Is it going to make the lives of Americans better if it happens? It is not for them to determine.”
According to Flynt, “People are too depressed to be sexually active. This is very unhealthy as a nation. Americans can do without cars and such but they cannot do without sex. … With all this economic misery and people losing all that money, sex is the farthest thing from their mind. It’s time for congress to rejuvenate the sexual appetite of America. The only way they can do this is by supporting the adult industry and doing it quickly.”
But Francis and Flynt admit that they really don’t even need a bailout. While DVD sales/rentals have fallen by 22% in the past year, the number of people visiting adult websites has grown.
Francis told CNN, “The popularity of adult entertainment in America has grown steadily for the past half century. Its emergence into the mainstream of popular culture suggests that the US government should actively support the adult industry’s survival and growth, just as it feels the need to support any other industry cherished by the American people.”
Folks, this is asinine. I opposed bailouts of institutions that were legitimately in a position of going under. I ESPECIALLY oppose the bailout of an industry that is 1) not failing and 2) COMPLETELY UNNECESSARY to the survival of the American economy.
If any Congressman does not throw away this request within about 30 seconds of reading it, I will have lost all respect for that Congressman (unless he decides to keep it to cheer himself/herself up because of the pure hilarity of the concept).
But I think we all owe Flynt and Francis a big thank you. Thank you for showing Americans how STUPID these bailouts are! Why shouldn’t the adult entertainment industry get a bailout if the auto industry did? Are we now discriminating? Instead of deciding who does and doesn’t deserve a bailout, Congress should simply STOP giving bailouts and give BACK the half-wasted tax dollars of the American people.
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